behavior vs. heart...

a couple of weeks ago, Joey, our pastor, said something in his sermon that I took as sage parenting wisdom. I soooo wish i'd written it down but the very loosely-quoted nugget is this.:

When ministering to people, we need to minister to the heart, and not try to change the behavior. When God changes the heart, a behavior change will naturally follow.

That is great ministry advice, but it is also advice that I want to follow on a daily basis as I parent my children. In a crazier-than-we-normally-are back-to-school adjustment period -- nothing major, just regular kid stuff-- Scott and I are having to continually remind ourselves that it is ok for our kids to make mistakes, and at the end of the day they need to be LOVED, not perfect. I am NOT GOOD at this... I'm too tempted to want my kids to LOOK good, when what they need is to be loved well. Love is not self-seeking, and when I strive for appearances, what I'm really striving for is self-recognition and -affirmation.

Praying for my sweet babies' hearts!